- Moarfistin (Meph)
- 10 x Angry Marines (DC w/ various upgrades)
- Brother Caede (DC Dread)
- Land Speeder w/ AssCan and Melta
That's right, no scoring units. I decided that taking objectives was less important then JUST FUCKING KILLING EVERYTHING. I went not planning to win, or even come close, I was in it for the LULZ. Then...it was announced that, for the purposes of the tourney, anything with a WS counted as a scoring unit, unless specifically noted otherwise (death company, drones, etc). Hrm! That leaves me with one scoring unit (Moarfistin) and another scoring unit that won't actually stay still (Brother Caede). WELL SHIT, NOW I CAN'T LOSE!!
Here's the scene:
They also had a painting/model competition called the "Golden Grot". Basically you could enter models you would not be playing with in up to 3 categories, and all the people there would vote. I entered my Black Brother in single mini and got this:
What follows is a half assed attempt at some battle reports. Many of my pictures were awful and had to be deleted, so I've just included the (somewhat) acceptable ones.
BATTLE 1: ANGRY MARINES VS SHOOTY ORKS
Basically, this was a 3 objective mission; control/contest them at the end of the game and get points, you also got points for killing the enemy commander. My opponent had lotsa shoota boyz, lootaz, flash gitz, kommandos, and a big mek in a grot squad.
I could have played it safe, or I could JAM MY WHOLE ARMY DOWN HIS FUCKING THROAT UNTIL HE IS DEAD. I did some quick math in my head and decided, although it's a risk, there's a good chance it will work and I will probably board him in like 2 turns if it does. ALSO IT'S THE FUCKING ANGRY THING TO DO!!
So I charged my Raven (carrying Caede the Angry Marines) right into his shit, with my speeder and Moarfistin on it's heels. As expected, he surrounded it, assaulted it, and one lucky power klaw got through and wrecked it. Just about anything else would have been ok, but wrecked meant that I lost everything inside. FUCK, that was like 80% of my army. I gambled and lost, oh well.
Moarfistin did much better. He slaughtered his way though a flash git mob and a bunch of orks until he reached the Mek, who was then treated to a MIGHTY FUCKING FIST UP THE DICK. He then sat on the enemy's objective until the green hoard eventually pulled him down.
Overall, it was a fun game. I made a gamble and lost, but wracked up a nice kill tally and fought until the bitter end.
BATTLE 2: ANGRY MARINES VS BLACK TEMPLARS
Ahhh, my canon counterparts. WELL FUCK THEM, THEY AREN'T FUCKING ANGRY ENOUGH!!
This mission was interesting. Basically we each picked a troop model and "swapped" them. The "traitor" got an extra wound, a 5+ invuln, and became an independant char attached to the squad that the other traitor came from. I picked a Sgt w/ a power fist, he picked an Angry Marine with a Thunder Wrench. Basically you got points for:
- Kill the traitor
- Kill the traitor's Squad
- Kill the enemy Commander
- Keep them from doing all those things to you
His one pod (with the traitor and his Champ) dropped in right behind me to take revenge on Caede. A plasma pistol to the back saw him 'splode.
Crushing Victory for me! My opponent was really crippled by some unlucky reserve rolls. I was basically able to just overwhelm him because he kept coming in piecemeal :(
BATTLE 3: ANGRY MARINES VS BLOOD ANGELS
This was another objective mission, but a bit different. Basically you got points at the end of each enemy turn for each objective you had a scoring unit in B2B with. There were 4 objectives. I had, as stated before, two scoring units, one of which has ADHD.
My opponent had a tac squad mounted in a crusader with a Sang Priest, and an assault squad led by his commander, also with a Priest.
The assault marines took heavy casualties as they advanced on me ( I was rending like a boss), but they managed to take out my speeder. I then deployed my Angry Squad to FUCK THEIR SHIT UP. Meanwhile, Moarfist decided that after two turns of getting shot, that the Land Raider had blinked; he flew over and swatted off the melta and stunned it.
As you can see, no more assault squad or commander. The land raider and storm raven started exchanging fire, and the Angry Squad ran forward with a mighty FFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
Meanwhile, Moarfistin jumped over the Land Raider and began to fuck up the marines holding the back objective.
The Land Raider got a lucky Rend and took out the Raven, and THAT DUMBSHIT CAEDE WAS GOING TO MOVE AWAY FROM THE OBJECTIVE.
Luckily, there where no more enemy models after that, so I was able to sit on the markers and generate points until the game ended. VICTORY!!!
BATTLE 4: ANGRY MARINES VS SPACE WOLVES
This battle was just an annihilation mission; sounds great, right? Fuck no. I will just summarize since it was an embarrassment. Basically I tried to let him come to me, then counter attack(like game 3), when I should have pulled what I did in game 1. That combined with some surprise powerfists with 18 million attacks because the bearer holds the yiffing stone of wolfy mcwolfingston, or something, I don't fucking know. That has always been my problem with the puppies, at least other armies TRY to justify their cheesy nonsense rules, SW just paint two dogs fucking on a bolter and suddenly it's an ordinance melta gun that counts as a power sword in CC.
Regardless of my feelings on the in-the-closet-furries, I fucked up, and my opponent took advantage of that fuckup ruthlessly and efficiently. Here's the pics:
So 2 and 2? Waaayy better then I planned on, and I had a blast! After the games we moved onto the raffles (which I won nothing from) and the prizes. First I got this:
WAIT, WHAT? I THINK THERE HAS BEEN A MISTAKE! DO I FUCKING LOOK RED TO YOU?!?! The little blurb on the bottom made me laugh really hard, considering what I brought.
Then I got these! I ended up walking away with a Razorwing, LR Redeemer, and an armfull of other assorted loot!
I had no idea I was going to walk outta there with such a haul! If anyone from Berks Gaming club is reading this, thanks for your support, and thanks for putting on such an awesome event!!! Can't wait till next year!!